Nickerson

A particularly admirable entry from Il Cocko grande this one - difficult to imagine a grown man being any more childish than this cocking colleague on this ocassion!

The charm of christmas shopping

Celebrate big bras

The Sun is getting too easy a resource Malc - we might have to ban you in order to encourage you to get out more!

Neither cock nor fanny

Il Cocko Grande deserves to be ridiculed for this misspelt, low quality attempt to get his hit rate back up to his normal standard.

Forward your abuse of his pathetic efforts to me and I will make sure he gets it with both barrells.

Il Cocko Titchio

doo doo du du

Malc enjoying the high culture presented by The Sun - the best friend in the media of cockers everywhere!

Gaylord's

Malc hitting a run of form here with another gaylord entry. The umpires are checking whether he did actually go all the way to Nepal to find the gaylord ice-cream submitted earlier. There may be a spectacular qualification in the offing!

"Bogof!"

A comedy slurry tanker

Presumably they discounted the first suggestion - "a wagon full of shit and piss"

All Fours Cough syrup

Get some All Fours down your neck - that should take your mind off your cough. Found by Shaun in his Grandad's medicine cupboard. It looks like it has been there quite some time. Either Shaun's Grandad is fit and healthy, or All Fours is no good at all for a chesty cough!

Paint your Beaver

Another great submission from Shaun, who has had a busy cuople of days! "Can I procure a tin of Beaver please Mr Shopkeeper?" "Of course son, but we only sell Beaver 5 litres at a time - can you handle that much Beaver?"

Italian girl who does not fart

Tim brought this latin oddity back from his latest jolly to Milan. From onw on he will only answer to his new cocking pseudonym "Il Cocko Grande"!

Not Captain James Cock

Ian B deserving this special not called cock entry to celebrate his recent cocking exploits in Whitby. But you know better Ian than to try and con and old cocker like me into thinking you had an extra cock to your name!

Keep up the good work and cock of the month will one day be yours!

Prince Albert apples

Ian B taking advantage of the Whitby agricultural show's apple harvest in order to provide material for school children to snicker about. Well done Ian - you are our most valuable secret weapon in the campaign for cock!

Nepalese Gaylord Ice Cream

Malc from Skipton went all the way to Kathmandu to buy himself a listeria ridden ice cream from this rusty, weather beaten street vending stall. You could have got food poisoning much more cheaply Malc, by eating all the stale crumbs you find down the side of the sofa!

Great bit of work and welcome to the community of cocking colleagues. Keep your eyes peeled for a Kathmandunian Cock to grace the main parts of the site.

Cocking update: following a random cock test by the cocking stewards, this entry is now re-attributed to Rick, Malc's mate who is on a round the world trip. Malc receives our thanks for his cooperation with the test - he knows that the cocking standards have to be maintained!